What is success?

This is such a personal issue that it is often hard to clarify what we value as to what would make us successful versus what friends, family and society would define as success.

I mean we all look at those who are icons of success in our community and our world. Media defines success that is often equated with visibility, material possessions, and, often, beauty. However, most of us can never achieve the media hype that says skinny is right and money is might. I remember an old saying: A woman can never be too rich or too thin. And look what concepts like this have done to destroy the self-esteem of many women. And I will never forget the impact of the cliche “Men never make passes at girls who wear glasses.”

The meta message when I was growing up that to be a successful woman I should marry for money, keep looking gorgeous and never let anyone know that I was smart. Boy I did all that and I didn’t feel successful at all.

In my journey from then to now, my ideas of what I feel would make me feel successful has constantly been in a state of flux and change. I have come to the conclusion that while I would have no objection to being wealthy, famous, and defy the signs of aging, what I really desire is to feel content, to lead a simple life so that I can do what gives me pleasure.

And what gives me pleasure is writing. Since I am doing that I guess that I can officially say that I am successful.

My Enchanted Cottage

I often refer to my home as my enchanted cottage. It is small and white and surrounded by flowers and gardens. It is at least 60 or 70 years old and carries with it the memories of many who have lived here before.

When Alice, my white ghost dog, was with us she would often point out to me that ghosts or spirits were in the house. We would be downstairs and hear a chair rocking upstairs when no one was upstairs and in fact there was no rocking chair. I would often walk through the house and feel cold spots which are indicative of ghostly or spirit presence.

You never knew when you went around a corner to another part of the house what energy one would pick up. It was like around the corner one would encounter a portal between our four dimensional reality and another dimension where spirits wander and perceive our realities. I am not really a ghost buster but I do know that spirits often get trapped in limbo between this reality and the infinite reality that is oneness with the divine. I began to meditate on this entity and was able to perceive that it was the woman who originally owned the property when it was a huge family farm. As I investigated more I found people who had known her and habits and I was able to get more and more in tune with her energy.

Drawing a white circle of energy protection around me, I began to smudge the house with sage. I also started to light white candles and pray for her release and help. Finally I was able to talk with her and explain her situation and guide her to go toward the light and release her bounds to the earth. It became peaceful in the house and I could feel that she had truly passed over to the other side.

A year later, I awoke to an awful smell. It was the smell of death. I called my husband and we searched to see if an animal perhaps had died out side on the porch but we could find nothing. I fell back to sleep and had a dream. In the dream a woman was desperately searching for her mother and could not find her. It was sad and frightening to feel her loss and pain. In the dream I was able to find the path to discovering her mother. And I awoke. The smell of death was gone.

Later that day I talked with a friend who knew the family of the original owner of the home. The woman’s daughter had died the night before.

Sometimes we never really know what is around the corner but we can rest assured that many an epiphany can be discovered if we are willing to take the risk to expand our awareness of our reality.